Welcome
Thank you for visiting my website.
Please let me introduce myself. My name is Louis Cyphre. I’ve been around for a long, long year.
If you are interested in finding out more about me or discussing some of the work I have been up to these days, please comment below. Hopefully I can clear up some of the misunderstandings you may have about me.
Also, if you are interested in making a deal, as you may know, I am in the business of collecting souls. Please make me an offer and I’ll see what I can do.
Hope you have a hell of a day.
Yours truly,
Louis
hell is wat care to know about
Hi there, and thank you for your question.
I believe you are asking about what it’s like in hell.
Well, it’s quite warm down here. In fact, it never gets cold, so you don’t have to worry about shoveling snow.
As far as what the residents do, it’s pretty much a non-stop party filled with all of the great sins known to man: alcohol, drugs, cigarettes, sex, gambling, cage fighting, reruns of the Jersey Shore, and more.
It’s actually a lot of fun, but for some reason, it gets a bad rap.
Perhaps you’ll join us someday.
Louis
P.S. Anything to offer?
does vampire really exist,because i want to be one of them….
Hi danah, thank you for your question.
Yes, vampires definitely do exist. And you may not be aware of this, but if you say the word “abacadabra”, a vampire will turn into a bat.
Alternatively, if you want to turn the bat back into a vampire, you say the words “hocus pocus.”
I created these magical words in consultation with Count Dracula back in the 1400s. They were supposed to be secret words among vampires, but someone (I’m guessing Van Helsing) let the cat out of the bag.
The first time I realized the secret was out was while eating cereal and watching Bugs Bunny one Saturday morning back in 1963. I choked on my Fruit Loops when I heard Bugs utter the words.
Anyway, I wish you all the best in your quest to become a vampire, and I’ll see you in hell.
Hi,i want to know about things relating to scam,in short,how to get money online.
what does it takes if i want to sign up and pls show me the way
michael, great question.
There are lot of wonderful scams online. I’ve been impressed with the Nigerians and their creative methods of ripping suckers off. Unfortunately, that scam has pretty much run its course.
More recently, the cheap Viagra scams have been fairly successful. And in that same vein, the male “enhancement” scams are really rising in popularity. Of course, the beauty of this scam is that the “enhancement” pills are nothing more than cheap placebo (i.e. sugar).
You might also want to look into psychic paranormal bullshit. If you can learn some basic cold reading techniques you can really take people to the cleaners while they’re talking with their long-dead relatives.
With all of these scams, you should do some email spamming with the help of other scamsters in places like Russia and India. At the same time, set up some phony websites (you can make nice-looking sites for free these days) and get a couple of phone lines (preferably 900 numbers).
Send out some spam and wait for the calls (and cash) to roll in.
Good luck my fiendish friend!
Louis
P.S. Rather than do something online, you might want to consider becoming a stock broker, banker or hedge fund manager. That’s where the truly big-time scams are taking place these days.
djinee,
I’m pleased to hear that you would like to hand over your soul to yours truly. By doing so, you will no longer have any morals or feelings of empathy. In a word, you will become a psychopath. As a psychopath, you will be able to fuck over any one you want without remorse. Congratulations, my son.
how do i become a powerful magicians
Hi Terry,
Magic, eh? Hate to break it to you my friend, but mere mortals like yourself cannot do real magic.
However, I would encourage you to learn “magic tricks” which will help you line your pockets in a delightfully devilish sort of way.
What I’m talking about are magic trick games like “Three-Card Monte” and “The Shell Game”. These games have been mastered in places like Manhattan, where street hustlers pilfer naive tourists.
It’s all about playing on the greed of others in order to satisfy your greedy desires as well as give you some mischievous excitement in an otherwise dreary existence.
I recommend you hook up with a talented conman, learn the ropes by being one of his shills, then strike out on your own and begin your new life as a “magician” where money is “magically” removed from dim-witted dupes.
Good luck, Magic Man. Make me proud.
Louis
i want to be rich.. and to conquer the world
Sure, you want to be rich, own mansions on the beach, own yachts and the most expensive sports cars, have any beautiful woman you want, have people wait on you hand and foot. YAWN. You humans are so predictable. Next…
u know >>>>>>
I don’t believe in this shit !! and believe me, hell, is not a pleasant place to stay !! I prefer GOD and heaven !! and u r a human like us !!it’s impossible to u to be DEVIL, and I think u fucked up all of these people who’s askin’ u !! STOP IT
Thank you for your comments, white Angel.
Did you know I used to be an angel too back in the day? Ah, but times have changed.
I truly appreciate the anger in the tone of your voice. You show promise. Perhaps someday you will join us down below. It’s a lot more fun than you imagine.
In the meantime, have a hell of a day, and tell that white-bearded fellow I said ‘hi’.
Louis
How about my one soul for 5 million in cash?
Hi Johnny,
I apologize for the delay responding. I’ve been at a rowdy roast the past few days. It was quite a scream for the guests of honor, McVeigh, Dahmer and Koresh, who happened to be the ones getting roasted.
As for your offer, it’s a fairly hefty sum for one measly soul, however, I’m willing to do the deal.
Unfortunately, as it sits right now, I’ve loaned most of my U.S. dollars in the form of liar’s loans, high-interest credit cards, adjustable rate mortgages, and lines of credit.
I’ve also been lending a lot of cash these days to those ingenious payday loan shops located in the beautifully dismal strip malls littered across America’s suburban wasteland.
And as you can imagine, the PIIGS across the pond have tapped me out of Euros.
So I hope you don’t mind, but I’m going to have to pay you in Zimbabwean dollars. Ya, ya, I know what you’re thinking, but trust me, it’s an up-and-coming African currency.
Let me know if you’re interested.
Sincerely,
Louis
myine is up for grabs dude.$10 000000 in a serious deal though not as fucking as you are.
how about my soul to be come a vampire?
Hi Cleo,
Thank you for your offer. It’s a little pricey, nonetheless, the check (or cheque, if you’re from the Commonwealth) is in the mail. Be patient, however. The postal service is so slow these days you might have to wait until hell freezes over.
Look forward to seeing you in the land of fire and brimstone.
Louis
Vampire princess, eh? Sounds sexy. Are you not already a vampire?
If not, I can certainly make the trade for your soul. However, there are two things you must do. You must watch the Twilight series of movies 666 times. When finished, you must read the Twilight series of books 666 times, from back to front. Only that way will you discover my secret to eternal life as a blood-sucking vampire.
I know, it seems like a lot to ask, but hey, when you finish, you’re going to live forever, so what’s the big deal?
Good luck, and I hope to meet you soon. Perhaps we can share a bottle of my finest red, Nixon 1974.
Your truly,
Louis
all am looking for is money am ready to loose my soul to the devil just to have money so how can i make money i want to be part of anything just to have money and be on top of the world
Why are you doin this??? You will never get me!!
Do you really want people that hell is a good place to be… I wouldnt want to burn all day… I will never sell my soul to you!!!
nas,
I sense the desperation in your voice. You want to be filthy rich and on top of the world. Well, I can help. But there are some things you must do.
First, you must watch Justin Bieber’s movie “Never Say Never” 13 times in succession. Then you must listen to Justin Bieber’s album “My World” 666 times. Then you must sing Bieber’s hit song “One Time”, record it on video, then upload it to YouTube. Then you must get at least 13,666 views. Once you have done all that, you will have successfully sold your soul and you will be filthy rich.
Good luck my son.
Louis
Miracle,
You have posted two comments in a short period of time, which suggests that you really want to speak with me. I understand. It is tempting to want to speak with someone you have been taught to fear. It’s like the scene in a horror movie when a woman is all alone in a house and she hears a noise upstairs. While terrified, she can’t help but investigate. Of course, you know what usually happens to her. But my dear, you have no reason to fear me. I am your friend.
You say that you will never sell your soul to me. I have heard this refrain millions of times over my career. Yet over time, the lost souls who resist me most are the ones who cannot help but be seduced by my charm.
Miracle, share with me your innermost desires, and old Louis will see if he can help you.
Talk to you soon, Mon Chéri.
What a typical response!!
Believe me i do not fear you.. I only fear God… I just curious about a man selling his soul to the devil…
i ‘m Michael & i love to see you in my life thx.
Miracle,
You certainly should fear God because he demands too much of you. And if you don’t live up to his lofty expectations, the mean old prick will punish you for eternity!
But here’s the little secret your God has been keeping from you, Miracle. His punishment is sending you to hell. But that’s no punishment at all because, as I have described above, hell is not a bad place. In fact, it is the biggest non-stop party in the universe. Where else can you revel in your dirtiest sins? Only in hell, my love.
Heaven is for prudes and goody-goodies. How boring!
Louis
Finally, a mortal who doesn’t ask for anything!
Michael Antwi, I have a special place in hell for you.
Louis
im kinda lost.explain more. what i have to do.i jus wanna be a famous rockstar who gets a lot of women and money..
Hi louis. I want 2 b posses by marine power, so i can have all i want i.e pleasure, women, money and power. So just give me d step 2 have dis things send it 2 my mail box or pls kindly visit me at night by taking my soul 2 d marine world i.e d water.
what has twlight to do with becoming a vampire? unless im going to look like them
Joshua,
Sorry for the delay in responding. I have been busy collecting sucker money during the March Madness tournament. Getting VCU and Butler into the Final Four was my coup de grace.
Want to a be a rock star and have a lot of broads and money, eh? You are a man after my own heart, Joshua. Nice biblical name by the way. A little irony is always welcome.
To fulfill your desires, you must take an electric guitar to a crossroad near the old Dockery Plantation in Mississippi at midnight. When you arrive, I will tune the guitar for you. I may even play a few tunes.
When I give you back the guitar, you will be a master and all of your dreams will come true…well at least for the next 30 or 40 years…then you’ll have the privilege of joining me in hell.
See you at the crossroads my friend.
Louis
Dan.k,
By “marine power,” do you mean want the powers of a super hero like aqua man?
Or do you want to be master of a sailing ship whereby you can become a modern day pirate?
Or do you want the power of a marine (i.e. grunt) whereby you carry out dirty work on behalf of the American President?
You’ll have to be a little clearer Dan.k. Once you are, I’ll be sure to grant you your wish.
Also, I appreciate your polite suggestion that I take your soul at night.
The fact is, I love taking souls at night. Unfortunately, it’s usually not a “kindly” sort of affair. It tends to be a little dark and horrifying. You might say it’s a little hellish.
Look forward to hearing back, Dan.k.
Louis
vampire princess,
First of all, watching the Twilight movie and reading the book 666 times will show me that you are truly committed to the depressing life of a blood-sucking vampire.
Secondly, because the Twilight story is so moronic, the viewing and reading exercise will drain you of all your intellectual capacities which are of no value when your sole purpose is to drink the blood of homo sapiens. It’s kind of like being a heroin addict – no need for a brain when your only goal in life is to stick a needle in your arm.
That make sense?
Louis
How do vampire’s look like
please can i have a chat with the devil please help me and also i want to see him in my dream to night
i want to be a vampire please
how can i see you face to face am in ghana
Common louis stop fooling people, u blasphemy. U think u can take control over everybody’s life, that’s a big lie u know?
Rima,
Vampires are usually very attractive on the outside, but underneath the skin they are monstrous, just like they are in the movies. However, there is one little know fact about vampires that is never shown in movies. They are hermaphrodites. In other words, they have both male and female sex organs. So, that beautiful vampiress is actually packing sausage in her pants. And that handsome male vampire? Let’s just say he gets a little bitchy every 28 days or so.
joseph,
Don’t do dreams; only do nightmares. In fact, I’m working on a nightmare for you right now that will make you wet your bed. Hope you enjoy it!
See you soon,
Louis
Joseph, forgot to address your desire to be a vampire. I don’t keep track of all the vampires these days – there are simply too many of them thanks to the Twilight movies and all of the other blood-sucking crap coming out of Hollywood. Anyway, as I understand it from your president, John Atta Mills, apparently there are many “vampires” invading Ghana in an effort to steal the country’s oil reserves. (In addition to their thirst for blood, vampires have an insatiable thirst for money and power.) So, what you should do to become a vampire is to get into the oil industry in Ghana, make friends with the vampires, then get one of them to convert you into an immortal demon. At the same time, you will be earning an income in the earth’s most evil business, oil exploitation.
Good luck!
Louis
Mustorph,
“A wise man can learn more from a foolish question than a fool can learn from a wise answer.”
- Bruce Lee, kung fu master
what d fuck is this website anyway…
Are you for real.
shuji, I think you know what this website is. You were searching around the Internet looking for the Devil, and guess what? You found him!
Would you like to make a deal?
Louis
Petea,
I think, therefore I am.
Are you for real?
Louis
So tell me hw can i become a star.
If i get u believe me u are gone.
Petea,
If you want to become a star, get some friends together and write a song. The song can be about anything – dancing at a club, a day of the week, your favorite pair of jeans, etc.
Once you’ve written the song, find a computer nerd who has a makeshift music studio in his basement and record the song – doesn’t matter if you can sing or not; the nerd should be able to auto-tune over any voice failures.
Once you’ve recorded the song, hire a cheap video production company and make a music video. After completing your video, upload it to YouTube, then watch the views go through the roof!
In no time, you will become the next Justin Bieber, Jenna Rose or Rebecca Black. Who knows? You might even become the next Tonje Langeteig and record a hit song like “I Don’t Wanna Be A Crappy Housewife.”
But you better work fast because Tonje’s song is clearly a sign to all humanity that the end is nigh.
Have fun!
Louis
Louis, why do you deceive people?
Just now examined the thread. Amazing job.
Fiona,
How am I being deceptive?
I am simply providing advice on how to fulfill one’s burning desires.
What is your burning desire, my dear?
Louis
Incepecetasah,
Thank you for your kind words. Looking forward to sharing a pitcher of beer with you once your mortal life ends and your journey of eternal damnation begins down here in Hades.
Louis
Hello
Please send details of your membership.
Tell me things to do to get along with you.
Please let me know what it takes to be a member.I need your urgent reply through my mail
o k my greatest wishies i want to get my visa and to be possess by your master and carry message true music by singing them so i want to became a entertainer and famous and get my visa to beabe to go to america,so let me know your answer by email
kenny,
To become a member you must pay your dues above ground.
If you’re experiencing pain, suck it up brother. Pain is a part of the deal. NO ONE ESCAPES IT!
As many wise mortals have discovered, “hell is here on Earth”.
Enjoy!
Louis
sexxie,
I have already detailed the step-by-step process of becoming a famous singer – READ ABOVE!
The key is for you to post a music video on YouTube – that’s where all the no-talent wannabes are becoming overnight sensations.
As for wanting to go to America, I totally understand your desire. America is the land of milk and honey.
Absolutely everybody in America is rich and famous, lives in mansions, drives around in fancy cars and drinks expensive champagne for breakfast.
After you hit the big time with your YouTube video, make sure you go America and hang out with the other 307 million stars.
Louis
Isn’t there any easier way 2 become a vampire? I’m sick of twilight already…
louis,
are you for real?because to me you look childish in your comment.
If truely you are real then try and reply me for once.
If you are real do you help people.
Tell me more about you by replying my mail.
i will make a deal with you. but in return you will haft to turn me in to Josie Romero the 8 year old girl born a boy but it will be a day be for her 8th b-day.
thankyou
Nate Bennett
be in my bedroom when you get this comment. pleses do four things for me and then i will make my wish and will you pleses gant my wish.
How can i get money and be richest man in the world
Let me tel u i am no more intresting in jabos or what ever.i belongs to the God almighty and u woun’t get me.go to hell and burn to ashes whit ur tricks
louis
pleases send me a email at addison1267@yahoo.com and tell me in your email if you are a man or a woman and it better be a woman and i ment to say for you to do 6 things for me.
i know you are a man but i want to have sex with you but i am a transgender man i dress as a woman so pritty pleases send me a email at addison1267@yahoo.com amd buy me a fake vagina and a wedding dress and fake breast or transform me int a woman and i will marry you and love for every. if i want become a josie romero you will get my soul but you will have to put me back on erth or i will go back to god an ask him to for give my i will get my soul back from you and you will give it back to me
dear louis
you better be in my bedroom when i go to my bedroom right now. and you will do 7 things for me
kenny gee,
If you’re looking for help, you’ve come to the wrong place, my friend.
Remember who I am?
Louis
nate,
You’re telling me to do things for you? You’re arrogance is certainly wicked.
You also sound like quite the freak. You should do well down here in the land of fire and brimstone.
Once you get here, I’ll give you as many vaginas as you can handle. I’ll even put one on your hand which will give you the ability to…well, use your imagination.
In the meantime, you must endure the tortures of living above ground. Life is the price of admission into hell. There are no shortcuts.
Regards,
Louis
Jose maria,
In your second post, you told me to “go to hell”. Hilarious! That’s a good one.
As for your initial request to be the richest man in the world, I get this request all of the time. I have outlined some methods above. You might want to give them a read.
If you don’t like any of those ideas, I have something else you might want to try. In your second post, you said you belong to “God Almighty”. The fact that you came to me, obviously suggests that you don’t have much faith in the bearded old man.
So, here’s what you can do. You can pretend to be a servant of Yahweh, like you are now, and become a preacher. Start a church, tell people that if they want to get to heaven, they must donate their life’s savings to your church. In return, you’ll make sure they get a pass into Paradise.
How will you do this? By talking to the Almighty himself, of course. At least, that’s what you’ll tell your flock of suckers.
Within a few years, you won’t necessarily be the richest man in the world, but you should be filthy rich and you’ll be able to enjoy a fine life of debauchery.
Good luck, my son.
Louis
Hi, I’m arianna .. I read what you said hell is and I like it but how could I believe
you for all I know your a loser who has nothing else to do
but a part of me does believe you
if you can help me become a vampire that won’t die in the sun, and that is rich and my family gets special protection
you can have my soul >:)
i wana b part dats all
u……i’m talkin to you louis u are a loser forever
Ariannavdpierce,
I will grant you your wish, however, keep in mind you are selling your soul to satisfy your shallow, greedy, self-centered desires (i.e. eternal life and personal wealth). Furthermore, while experiencing eternal life as a vampire, you will be slaughtering innocent humans in order to drink their blood. In exchange for this blissful existence, I get your soul, which includes all feelings of compassion for others including your family. Hence, there will be no special protection for your loved ones. They will be subject to merciless, diabolical death, just like every other mortal. Think this is unfair? Your damned right it is. Who do you think you’re dealing with, sister?
Louis
lasisi,
I’m assuming you’re offering your soul for eternal damnation, and you’re not asking for everything in return! Wow, such generosity! There is always room in hell for charitable soul like yours.
As for your follow up comment that I’m “a loser forever”, I sense you are an impatient fellow. I apologize for my tardy response, however, please keep in mind there are millions waiting in line to get into hell.
Now if you’ll excuse me, I have some sex, sin and debauchery to attend to.
See you soon, my son.
Louis
y dus it 2k u lng 2 rply.
would you still make a deal to kid if they are 12 years old?
i have been wanting to be a vampire for the longest …..i will gie my soul for that just aslong as i get to walk in the sun…..but will i hurt the ones i love
please, i would like toned all their wealth and any necessary condition on it i will abide the law. here is my contact+2347053898476
Hey I was wondering… Can a kid become a vampire ? And if so can they do it by the cheesy spells on YouTube or only through Satan?
how can i make money? i know u can do it, so now tell me what i can do to make that money.
hope to hear from you soonest.
regards